The office is the coldest room in my house. Facing north it doesn't get a lot of sunlight, and the radiator is directly underneath the window, so much of what heat it generates disappears outside immediately. So I have a little halogen heater to keep the place cosy in winter, which also gives off a bright and pleasant firesidey glow and saves you having to turn the light on then wait 45 minutes for the useless "energy-saving" piece of shit to actually reach some sort of vaguely worthwhile level of illumination.
(Never mind about the Iraq war – I'd put Tony fucking Blair in prison for the rest of his life just for robbing us of proper lightbulbs, the wanker.)
The heater has three replaceable halogen elements. This is the process for replacing one of them (click to see the whole thing):
I have two questions for the manufacturers.
1. Are you SURE there isn't some further level of disassembly I could have to go to in order to put a new bulb in? Perhaps I could have to melt the plastic down to a liquid and then re-form it around some sort of mould made out of the polystyrene packaging, or take the whole fucking thing down to the Large Hadron Collider and have them bombard it with electrons at close to the speed of light until there was a decent-sized hole in the front panel that one could insert the replacement bulb into.
2. What are you, fucking STUPID OR SOMETHING, OR WHAT?
2(a). Or just CUNTS?